Adoption Woes

Here's a rant for you: Why does adoption have to be so hard to do and so stinkin' expensive?

My wife and I have been through three cycles of in vitro fertilization with no luck. This in itself costs upwards of 15 grand a pop.

So we looked into adoption. Holy cow, do they really pry into your life! And then you have to pay out the nose for it! It is so frustrating that unfit parents have children everyday but it is so hard for someone that really wants these children to help out and provide a good home. It really makes you feel like God is punishing you.

I have a friend at work in the same situation that has chosen to adopt from Ethiopia because the cost is less than most other countries. He is anticipating $20,000 in costs for the adoption! I know there are children all over the world growing up without parents. I don't understand who makes it so difficult to help and why.

Book Club.....or Book Report?

I've obtained a copy of the Sirens of Titan and I'm ready for the sort of book club planned at the English 101 blog site. It sounds like fun but......I'm a little unsure. If nothing else at least the book looks like a great read, the kind of novel right up my alley.

Reading a book and discussing it with other individuals sounds fascinating but it kind of takes me back to grade school book report days, you know what I mean? I've never been in a book club but I'm hoping this endeavor as more of a discussion than a book report. Although I've always absolutely loved to read I really disliked giving oral book reports up in front of the class.

I remember a specific incident in the third or fourth grade. We were required to have 9 book reports done by the end of the first half of the year. I think I had 4 or 5. I had read plenty of books, I just didn't want to to do the book reports and, consequently, I got my first (and only) dreaded "U" on my next report card. This did not fare well with my mother who happened to be the school librarian. This ended up with me receiving my first (and only) grounding.

So in my signature stubborn and passive aggressive fashion I decided if they wanted a book report they were going to get a book report. Rather than reading your typical Hardy Boys adventure I chose a nonfiction book detailing US immigration and immigration policies from 1910-1914. Not quite your typical 4th grade reading material, you have to admit. Needless to say my teacher was less than thrilled and the incident ended in a little "coming to Jesus" meeting.

I didn't have problems getting the book reports done after that but I never did learn to like delivering them. I think this was because nobody else really seemed to care or express an interest and the whole format discouraged any discussions or other opinions. Hopefully the book club will be a completely different experience.

The end of music as we know it?

How many combinations are there to the eight notes in an octave? I realize that I am not a mathematician by any means but surely there is limit to the combinations possible. Especially to those combinations that sound pleasing to the ear.

I used to think that a lot of what they pass for music nowdays was the result of talentless songwriters and even less talented performers. Maybe it's not their fault. At least not that of the songwriters. Maybe over the course of human history they have just slowly limited their possibility of achieving original content and slowly started to work themselves out of a job? Maybe that's why there have been so many redone songs in the past decade.

All the good ones have already been taken.

Child Labor Laws

All the people complaining about the cold weather this year have prompted recollections of delivering newspapers while growing up in North Dakota. Thinking about this made me think about the absurdity in some of the loopholes in child labor laws.

I delivered newspapers from late grade school through early high school. This was really about the only way to earn money available to someone that age because child labor laws prohibited you from having a real job that worked real hours that paid a real wage.

So instead I got up around 4:30 am to deliver newspapers on my 7 mile long paper route in subzero temperatures combatting stray dogs and ice and snow. My dad was nice enough to drive me around on the route if the windchill was 30 below zero or greater. I have many memories of getting up in the dark and staring bleary eyed at the TV screen hoping that The Weather Channel would say that it was below -30. There are not many of us that actually pray for those temperatures.

Then there was the pay…..7 cents a paper? You have got to be joking. This is typically well below minimum wage. And they forget to mention that they don’t even actually pay you. They send you a bill for the papers they give you and it is up to you to collect from the customers and pay the bill. The extra is yours to keep for your efforts. You have no idea how many people will actually have no qualms about stiffing a kid. What a bunch of low-lifes. I know there were months that I actually paid to be subjected to this cruelty.

So, where were the child labor laws here? I couldn’t wash dishes in a nice warm restaurant for a decent wage at decent hours but I could be out in the freezing dark for hours for less than minimum wage? Sounds like government bureaucracy at its best.

"Help, help!! I'm being repressed! I'm being repressed!"
from Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail

Disturbed Concert

Cris and I just got back from a Disturbed concert. They were AWESOME! Sevendust was also there but they really kind of sucked. The opener was some band I had never heard of called Skindread. They were a little unusual. That was the first time I ever heard heavy metal crossed with reggae.

Not real sure about this blogging thing yet

Well, I've been blogging for the better part of a week now and the jury is still out on how much I like this whole blogging thing. I'll need to give it a bit more time before I decide how big of a blogging fan I'm going to be. It's reminiscent of journaling exercises a speech theerapist made me do in grade school. When I was young I stuttered so badly that I was the kid in he class that would try to shrink down in his desk so as to not be called on by the teacher. Stuttering can be hard for someone that age, you get a lot of kids acting like Billy Madison: "T-T-T-Today, junior!" Also, I noticed that adults tended to talk to you more loudly and slowly when they realized that you stutter. Not quite sure what that was about, I guess they assumed a stutterer's IQ is comparable to his shoe size and I suppose my ensuing looks of bewilderment perpetuated that impression.

Anyway, back to the point, this speech teacher made me journal everyday and I absolutely HATED it. I would wait until the end of the week and 10 minutes before she showed up I would write a bunch of made up stuff for everyday that week. I would rather have been doing new things than writing about things that were already over and done with. Maybe this is why the therapy never worked, huh? I eventually overcame the problem in high school after taking matters into my own hands and purposely taking a speech class and then participating in the high school plays and musicals. Just goes to show: If you want to get anything right, sometimes you just got to do it yourself.

By the way, since I've mentioned speech impediments, who's the smart ass that decided what word to use to describe a "lisp"? I've heard someone mention this before and I feel bad for the guy with a lisp telling you that he has a lisp. "I have a lithp." Really now, that is just cruel.

Thoughts on Natural Selection and Global Warming

I overheard an interesting response lately when someone I know mentioned the the plight of the polar bears because of the ongoing global warming crisis. Another persons response was that polar bears need to adapt, that's how natural selection works. Needless to say this is not really the reaction the other person was looking for but I think it is an interesting point nonetheless.

This brought the following question to mind: What would Darwin think about various species not being able to adapt to global warming? Or any man-made situations for that matter? Is it really our fault if the spotted owl can't learn to shop in a strip mall? Isn't "survival of the fittest" really the cornerstone of the natural selection theory? From what I understand, natural selection ensures betterment of the worldwide species gene pool by making sure those more likely to suceed will survive. Just nature's way of making us all stronger and more efficient. Does the world really need a bunch of pansy polar bears that can't conform? I think Darwin would probably say, "Put up or shut up." Or something like that. Or maybe not.

Although, in the end, I imagine humans will probably end up finding themselves on the same endangered species list if they are not more careful. And they will probably have no one but themselves to blame with their reckless practices. But hey, that's natural selection, right? Isn't this behavior what got Charleton Heston into such a predicament in all those "damn, dirty ape" movies in the first place? Personally, my money's riding on the cockroaches to ultimately end up winning this whole survival of the fittest game. Except if that's the case I probably won't be able to enjoy the payoff since the cockroaches will be the only ones left.

Well, maybe also the dolphins, who will probably have nothing to say except:
"So long, and thanks for all the fish."
from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

How to fix the police/fire pension fund

I live in Springfield, Missouri. For the last year we have been listening to the city council lament about the underfunding of the city police and fire pension fund. They want to raise taxes to place the blame for their incompetence and lack of foresight on the taxpayers of Springfield. This way, if we don't vote for the tax, it is our fault for the underfunding of the police and firefighter's pensions.

But I have another more ingenious plan: Have you ever noticed the timing of the traffic lights in Springfield? Have you ever noticed that after you stop at a red light, wait for the red light and then finally get the green light you are pretty much guaranteed to have to stop again at the next light because it is just turning red as you approach? I think this is part of some evil conspiracy on the part of the city planners and the gas stations in Springfield. I bet they all are getting some type of perverse kick out of watching everyone race to every light just to stop and wait again. But wait, therein lies the solution to the underfunded pension fund! The solution is really quite elegant in its simplicity. Why doesn't the city council just demand the kickbacks from the gas stations that they should have been getting all along and apply them to the pension fund? This ought to be plenty to fully fund the pension plan.

Unless.......maybe.....possibly they are already part of the conspiracy too????? hmmmmm......